This is a lesson in giving clear instructions, using common sense, and being thankful.
Okay, I’m a little embarrassed about this one…
I have a kid who wants a new Xbox Series X gaming console from Santa this year.
What he doesn’t know is that all of Santa’s elves have been bought off by retail bots, and the turncoat elves are walking them out the back door of Santa’s workshop before they ever get loaded into the sleigh. Crony Capitalism has made it all the way to the North Pole.
It’s up to Dad (me) to rescue Christmas.
I walk into a GameStop on Tuesday and ask, “Do you have any Xbox consoles?”
The kid working there, who can’t be older than 20, quips, “No.”
Startled by his blunt response, I pause and ask, “When will you be getting more?”
He points to the ad on the front door and says, “On Friday…”
I read the ad. It says, “Black Friday Sale, starting at 7am.”
“How odd.” I thought. “They are having their Black Friday Sale a week in advance.”
(Now, I know what you’re already thinking, but I like to assume I’m smart enough to think this through. I’ll continue…)
There was no date on the door ad, and many businesses are having their sales weeks in advance, so I just figured it was a catchy gimmick to sell things before people had a chance to go broke the day after Thanksgiving.
Thursday (last night) rolls around, and I think to myself, “There’s NO WAY tomorrow is the sale.” I check the website. Sure enough, the online Black Friday sale started Wednesday at 8pm. They are obviously making a push to sell early!
I consult with my contact who has insider gamer intel. I tell him about the sale. He says, “If that’s the case, you’re gonna want to get there SUPER early. They’ll be all accounted for by 4:30am.”
All right! I got this! I’M SAVING CHRISTMAS!!!!!
(I should point out that this new Xbox is sooo hot, walmart.com sold out within a minute of them listing on their website, and scalpers are selling them for 150% more than retail on Ebay.)
Doors open at 7am…I get there at 3:50am. I look around. No one.
YES!!!! I’VE DONE IT!!!
4:30…no one else yet. Hmmm…GameStop must have done a really bad job advertising their sale. Maybe everyone is just trying to buy them online.
5:15…no one else yet…I’m starting to wonder. I go and read the ad on the door again. Not only does it say “Friday at 7am,” it also states “Shop GameStop.Com Wednesday at 8pm.” SEE! VALIDATION! THE ONLINE SALE IS HAPPENING SO THIS IS GONNA HAPPEN TOO!
5:45…my wife calls me on her way to work. “Has anyone shown up yet? What if you’re wrong?” I now know how Linus feels when being inquisitioned by Sally on “It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown.”
6:00…I nervously start texting my retired friend who brags to me how great his life is on a daily basis. He calls and lightens the mood. He laughs that I brought a lawn chair and even an empty water bottle I left in my truck, should mother nature come calling. No need for that though. I prepared by body for the long wait by depriving myself of all fluids, including those with caffeine.
6:30…no one else in line. I decide to put my lawn chair up so I don’t have to embarrassingly explain to the workers why I showed up so early. I must have horribly mismanaged my supply/demand calculation for this item.
6:40…one of my wife’s coworkers has a son who works a GameStop. He contacts his manager and confirms it’s next week.
“No…I must hold onto hope.”
6:58…I”m peering in through the glass, waiting for the bleary-eyed teenager to enter from the back of the store, and there, to the left, directly above where I had been sitting, is a holiday calendar the size of a letter-sheet of paper…
November 27, Black Friday Sale, 7:00am-10:00pm
“No…I don’t believe it…let me stay until 7:05 just in case!”
7:05…At this point, I’m hiding in my truck, thanking my stars that the only people who saw me were the few grounds workers and early workers at Target.
Nothing happens…They don’t open…
Now, this is the part where “Choosing your Attitude” comes into play. It wasn’t that hard, however, and do you know why? It was one of those moments where I screwed up soooo badly, all I could do is laugh at myself!
I decided to focus my energy on gratitude and being thankful.
I am thankful I can actually afford this ridiculous Xbox X.
I am thankful for the breakfast tacos and LARGE COFFEE I bought on my way home.
I am thankful I had the flexibility to go on such an excursion.
I am thankful for my friend who lightened the mood.
I am thankful for my beautiful wife, who just laughed it off as one of those silly “Manny things” I do, instead of screaming at me, “YOU BLOCKHEAD! YOU MADE ME MISS TRICKS OR TREATS!!!”
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! Enjoy some downtime!
-Manny